Forgive And Forget
by Darke-Angyl
Summary: Mutual loss leads to bonding together for survival. Rick/OC
1. Chapter 1

Rick felt the now unfamiliar feeling of hope well up inside of him as he watched Beth and his wife, Lori, helping Hershel come outside for the first time since the man's leg had been chopped off after being bitten by a walker. He caught Lori's eyes and nodded slightly, a small grin appearing on his face. 'I love you,' he mouthed to Lori.

A few seconds later, all hell broke loose. Walkers came from several different directions, blocking him off from being able to get to Lori and their son, Car. He yelled in frustration as he fought his way through as quickly as he could.

Rick was too late to save Lori. He knew it as soon as he saw Maggie walking outside with the baby cradled in her arms. He knew it when he saw the tears streaming down Maggie's face. Lori was dead, and the look on Carl's face told him that his son had taken on the burden of ending his mother's suffering. He felt like a walker himself as he pulled Carl into his arms.

After spending a few minutes in shock, Rick had to act. Without a word to anyone, he disappeared inside the prison and headed for the place Lori had died. He had to see it for himself. He stared in horror when he found the spot, and Lori's body wasn't there. At first, he thought that Carl may have missed for the first time, but then he heard it... the walker. The thing had eaten his wife so completely that there was no trace of her remaining, and it was so bloated from it that it couldn't even move. Rick completely lost it as he attacked the walker.

OUTSIDE, ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PRISON

She made her way through the woods, her vision blurry and unfocused from dehydration. She had run out of water the day before and food that morning, not that she had been having much the past several months anyway. A sudden severe cramping sensation in her stomach had her freezing in her tracks. She looked around with wide eyes, her hands automatically moving to her hugely pregnant stomach. She had managed to find a dress that was too big for her in a store in the last town she had gone through four months before. It was ripped in several places and dirtier than anything she had ever worn, but it was a lot more comfortable than her jeans had gotten.

She doubled over as another pain ripped through her stomach, suddenly realizing that this was more than just hunger pains. She gasped as her water suddenly broke, flooding down her legs and pooling onto the ground. "Oh, no!" she whispered. She looked around wildly for a place she could get to, a place to hide. She knew that giving birth would attract any and all of the monsters in the area, and she didn't want to die. Noticing a tower in the distance, she hurried toward it as fast as she could go.

She clenched her teeth together as she climbed over the rubble, grabbing a metal piece of broken fence as she passed by on her way into the building. She paused for a couple of minutes after getting inside to allow her eyes time to adjust to the darkness and then slowly started making her way forward, trying to be as silent as possible. Another contraction had her screaming through her teeth just as she noticed a row of cells and realized that she was in some kind of a prison. She quickly made her way into the nearest open cell and slammed the door shut behind her. She knew they probably locked automatically when shut, but she figured she would deal with that later.

She took off her panties as quickly as she could, falling to the floor as the next contraction came. As another one came right after that one ended, she couldn't stop the scream from escaping past her lips. She screamed again when more monsters than she had ever seen in one place before suddenly appeared from around the corner and started trying to reach her through the bars. She backed up against the far wall, screaming again as another contraction came.

IN THE BOILER ROOM

Rick broke out of his stupor when he heard the unmistakable sound of a distant scream. Thinking it was someone from his group, he raced off in search of the source. Two more screams led him into an area of the prison that he had never been before, and he slowed down to make sure that he didn't run into anything unexpected. He knew that none of his people would be in this area. None of them had ventured this deep inside the prison.

A large group of walkers were attempting to get to someone trapped inside one of the cells. Rick started fighting his way through the group, his anger and frustration enabling him to get through them easily. His eyes widened when he reached the bars of the cell and looked inside.

She looked up in amazement as the monsters began to drop one by one, noticing the man as he made his way through the group. She knew that he couldn't be one of the monsters, not the way he was acting. As another contraction came, she drew her knees up to her chest and bit down on her lower lip hard enough to make it bleed.

Rick grabbed the set of keys from around his belt loop and quickly unlocked the door of the cell, letting it fall shut again behind him. He stared down in shock at the obviously pregnant young woman. "How long have you been here?"

She stared up at him, sweat pouring down her face. "I'm not sure. Not... long... owww..." Tears fell from her eyes, mingling with the sweat on her face.

Rick quickly knelt down in front of her, slowly moving to check out how far she had progressed. "Looks like you're ready to push." He gave her the best encouraging look he could manage. "What's your name?"

"A... lys... sa." She screamed through her teeth again to muffle the sound as she pushed with the next contraction. "Whe... re'd you... come from?"

"We're staying over in another part of the prison," Rick explained. "My fam... kids and I are part of a small group of survivors. What brought you in here?"

Alyssa managed to roll her eyes at him as she pushed again. "I thought... safer... knew the birth would... attract... monsters..." She clenched her teeth together and screamed again as she pushed as hard as she could.

Rick pulled off his shirt and used it to wipe away some of the sweat from the young woman. "You lost your husband?"

Alyssa shook her head. "No... husband... alone... long sto... ry..."

Rick nodded, looking down to see the baby crowning. "You're doing really well, Alyssa," he said, trying to encourage her. "One more big push. I know you can do it." He reached down to guide the baby out as the young woman pushed again. He tried not to react when he saw the blue skin tone to the baby boy, its cord wrapped tight around his neck. There would be no saving the stillborn.

Alyssa fell back against the wall, panting. After a few moments, she frowned and pushed herself back up. "Why isn't the baby crying? Aren't they supposed to cry when they're born?"

Rick nodded, turning his head to wipe away a few stray tears that fell from his eyes. The death of the newborn was one too many losses for him to deal with that day. He wrapped the blue-skinned baby in his shirt and gently laid him in his mother's arms. "I'm sorry, Alyssa."


	2. Chapter 2

Rick allowed the young woman a few private moments with her still born child, keeping his back to her as she sobbed. He kept his attention focused on the things going on outside of the cell the two of them were in. He knew neither of them could afford to stay very much longer. This part of the prison was far from secure. They had to move.

Alyssa stared down at her son, unable to stop the tears. She tried to stay quiet, knowing that any sound would draw the monsters to the cell, but she couldn't stop the sobs. They tore from deep inside of her, piercing the dank darkness that surrounded the area. She felt as if she would never be able to stop them.

Rick couldn't take any more. The loss of his wife, of the friends he had made over the past several months, and now the loss of this baby and the sorrow it was wrenching from the mother was just all too much. He made a quick decision and turned around, scooping the baby into his arms and looking down at the young woman. "I'm sorry, Alyssa. I really am. But we have to go. It's not safe here."

Alyssa looked up at him, barely registering what he was saying. Her eyes focused on the baby in his arms, unable to think about anything else as she reached up to try to take him back. She didn't care about anything else. She wanted her baby. That was it.

Rick sighed and used one arm to wrap around around the young woman and help her get up on her feet. "I know this is hard, but you have to push through it. We've all had to do it at one time or another, and now it's your turn. Take that grief and use it. Help keep my group safe from the walkers. Help us keep this place safe for all of us."

Alyssa took a shaky breath as she leaned on the man for support. "How many are in your group?" Now that she was more focused, she was doing her best to keep her attention off of her son. She knew that she needed to find something else to concentrate on if she was going to be able to help the man who had helped her.

Rick thought for a few moments while he made sure that she was steady on her feet. "I'm honestly not sure right now. We just lost a few, and I'm not sure yet how many." He unlocked the cell door and then slipped his free arm around her waist. "It's a long story," he explained as they started walking. "Easy does it... one step at a time, and keep your ears open." He glanced down at her as they made their way over the bodies that were piled up outside the cell. "Can you handle a gun?"

Alyssa nodded and reached for the gun in the holster on his side. She held on to him for support with one arm and kept the gun ready in her other hand in case they ran into trouble. "How far do we have to go?"

"We're in Cell Block C. It's a few corridors away." He tightened his arm slightly around her waist. "Are you gonna be able to make it?"

Alyssa shrugged. "It doesn't matter if I am or not. It's not like I have very many options at this point."

Rick nodded, knowing that she was right. They all had very few options left anymore. A hint of a smile came across his lips as he watched her shoot the handful of walkers that came across their path as they made their way through the corridors. "Nice."

Alyssa glanced up at him as she saw 'Cell Block C' written on a wall up ahead. "I've handled a few guns in my time." She fought tears as she glanced at her son laying lifeless in his arms. "What are we going to do with him?"

"We're going to bury him with the rest of the people we've lost here," Rick answered. Instead of heading toward the cells that his group occupied, he used his hip to push open the door that led outside. He led her toward the part of the yard where Glenn was talking to Axel and Oscar. He walked a few feet further away and helped Alyssa sit down on the grass.

"Rick?" Glenn asked, looking completely bewildered. "What's going on? Who's that?"

Alyssa reached up to take her son from Rick, cradling him close and trying to drive everything else out of her mind. She kissed the top of his head and let her tears fall again, silent this time, down her cheeks.

"She's someone I found in the back of the prison that was in trouble," Rick answered. "I need one of those shovels. I've got another grave to dig." He held up a hand when Glenn opened his mouth again. "I'll introduce her later and explain everything. Just give me the shovel now and let us bury her son."

Glenn sighed and closed his mouth, stepping over and taking the shovel Axel was holding. He handed it to Rick and glanced down at the young woman. "Let me know if I can help."

Rick shook his head. "I've got this. I need to do this." His emotions raged in his eyes as they met Glenn's. "There's nothing left of Lori to bury. A damn walker /ate/ her... /all/ of her."

Glenn's eyes widened in horror. "My god..." He shook his head. "I'll... We'll leave you alone for a little while." He glanced back at Axel and Oscar. "We can finish this in a little while." He nodded as the other two men walked away before looking back at Rick. "Let me know if you need anything."

Rick nodded his thanks and then turned his attention to digging the grave for the newborn. He took his anger and frustration out on the soil as he dug deep into the ground, feeling the sweat pour from his brow and down his skin. The sun baked the skin of his back as he worked, his shirt still wrapped around the baby boy.

Alyssa stared unblinkingly at the hole in the ground as it got deeper and deeper. She felt empty and hollow as she thought about the fact that her little boy would soon be resting inside that hole. She took a deep breath as Rick walked back over to her, knowing it was time. She had to let go of her son for the last time. She used the shirt he was wrapped in to wipe away as much of the gore from his little face as she could, kissing it gently before holding him up for Rick to take. As soon as her son was gone from her arms, she laid over on the ground and curled up into a tight ball.

Rick gently laid the newborn into the grave he had made before straightening up and re-covering the hole with dirt. He could feel the blisters forming on his hands, but he welcomed them. They were proof that he could still do what needed to be done, even when he felt as if everything was falling apart. As soon as the hole was covered, he dropped the shovel. He knew that one of the others would get it when they came back out to finish the other graves. He looked down at the young woman curled up on the ground and gently scooped her into his arms after putting his gun back into its holster. "Come on," he whispered as he cradled her against his chest. "Let's get you inside and cleaned up so you can rest."


End file.
